Wait- What Am I?

Below are some thoughts I had after my husband referred to me as 'prudish'. I realized that as a progressive, he sees me as prudish, while a conservative would see me (on the surface) as....well, just a conservative. I've decided that I'd vastly prefer a different label. How about Traditional Progressive? Hmm, no that doesn't work. Stuffy Progressive? Amish Progressive? Appropriate Progressive? I'm getting nowhere. You decide. What am I?

I like 'family values'. I like unconditional love, healthy relationships, and time spent together in meaningful and fun ways. I believe it takes two parents to raise children, and that, generally speaking, the family unit functions better when one parent is a homemaker. But I don't at all care what a family is made of. Two dads are just fine. I also think the decision about which spouse is the homemaking parent ought to be based on strengths and available resources, not gender.

I think homeschooling is a wonderful way to preserve the family unit and childhood. I believe it affords a unique opportunity to nurture our children's souls, minds, and future. But I do not hate public school, and I think the teachers are doing the best they can in a very challenging system.

With the exception of abuse, which can take many forms, I am opposed to divorce. I think marriage is sacred and a whole lot of hard work. I believe this applies to life partner situations as well. I think it matters much more that there is commitment, monogamy, and love than marriage as defined by 'one man and one woman', or marriage defined by the law.

I dislike what I believe birth control has done to our society's view of sex and life. But I support the existence of Planned Parenthood, and recognize that doing away with birth control is unrealistic and often detrimental.

I am embarrassed by most Victoria's Secret ads, and feel uncomfortable when I hear the lyrics of many secular songs. I value modesty of body and spirit. There is no 'but' here.

I want social programs such as food stamps, WIC, and a national health care plan to exist. But I want them to have a cost for recipients. I don't mean a financial cost necessarily, and I have no idea how to make that applicable on a large scale.( There probably isn't a way as it would have to be evaluated on a case by case basis). I just mean that if I am receiving $400 a month in food stamps, I am also doing something to warrant that expenditure.

I love wearing skirts and appreciate the chapel veil, but the only meaning they have is the one I give them. With skirts I feel pretty, with veiling, an increased focus on prayer.

I love my faith. I am a content Catholic. But I can't say I am 100% faithful to the Magisterium. 99.8% perhaps. I believe that 100% equals blind obedience. For a faith still reeling from a decades- long sex scandal, I would hope that more of the faithful would reserve that .2%.

Thanks for reading. I'm looking forward to your suggestions. Mama needs a new label. Prudish need not apply.

The Statistics of Moving

I have decided that every time we move it puts us behind by about 6 months. If you've read previously, you know we have moved 7 times in our almost 8 years of marriage. Let's do some quick computing.....ah, yes, we are 3.5 years behind right now. I can admit that a portion of this delay is because I am an 'interiors' kids of gal. Let me explain.

Did you know I was once an interior design major for three years? Yes, well, I was, and that is my passion. Because of that, I can't stand it when my living space is in shambles, when things are not organized to promote efficiency, when the toys are running the household, and when things are ugly. When we move, it takes time to figure out how our family uses the new space and how to use my decor to pretty- up the space. For example, I thought it would make great sense to do most of our schooling upstairs. The kids are all sharing one (large) bedroom, and we had a third room open for a school room. Except that, as it turns out, we like to do school downstairs and Mommy develops insomnia when she equates her bedroom with math and language arts. Which is why I am up at 11:30 blogging. For another example, the hideous floral wallpaper in the kitchen simply had to go and the space needed to be balances with some cool colors.

Well, it did.

The greater point here is that I think we (I) have come to grips with our space, and that we seem to be settling in to life in that space. On a truly bright note, it is happening about 3 months ahead of schedule. If this were any other move, we'd all still be walking around trying to remember the shortest distance from the yard to the potty. And that includes the grown- ups.

Yes, we've all settled in quite nicely. I found a tiny leak in the bathroom by the shower the other day. Alli immediately said, " We had better be able to fix it 'cause I don't want to move out of here!"

That was encouraging, heart- warming, soul- filling even. I agree with her, I love our house. We have trees. We have a great yard, bike riding space, a quiet neighborhood, a phenominal garage, a basement that is still pretty much empty, an awesome porch, and drywall. Can you believe it? We have drywall! We live across the street from a convent and have nuns as neighbors. Really, as a Catholic, can it get better? Christ in the Eucharist and nuns for neighbors. For my fellow Catholics, I needn't say more. ; )

So I guess that what it all comes down to is that even though we had a really bad expereince at our last residence, we are glad it brought us to where we are now. We hope to stay for a long time, to enjoy evenings on our porch, and to put up many Christmas trees in the front window. I think that potential is worth every move. Even if we are 3.5 years behind right now.

I'm Back?

It has been so long since I've posted that I'm not sure where to start. Here is my list of possibilities:
a. frugality and the desperate home decorator
b. Cathlolic and atheist, happily married
c. our most recent move/home
d. the skirts/dresses only movement
e. how insane topic 'd' makes me
f. realizing that we don't like Sonlight
g. converting to Catholicism
h. the pursuit of a different homeschool curriculum
i. my feelings about unschooling
j. gulp....I think I miss working
k. the fruits of following through with an overscheduled life

What do you think? Where should I start?

The Calm on My Soul

I just returned from Daily Mass. With my three kids. Who are all 6 and under. The day had not started out well (lots of fighting and screaming from 5:45 a.m.)and at some level I wondered if I was utterly insane to leave the house with them, let alone to take them somewhere where they would be sitting, quietly, presumably without touching each other.

I am not even Catholic yet, and this was their first experience with Mass. Alli did awesome, Dante catapulted himself over a pew, and Kai flipped through the pages in the hymnal with such force that I thought they were going to fly out of the binding. I've no idea how many times I said "Shhh!!", and I really hope we didn't leave any half- eaten jelly beans embedded in the carpet that covers the pews. I also have no idea how, after all of that, I left with a sense of peace. I felt utterly even, light, and calm. Actually I do know how. But, see, to admit it is to get closer to committing.

I can't say that I want to be Catholic. I feel called to be. It isn't 'fun for the kids', a popular choice, or one that even makes sense to me. I am a Democrat, for goodness sake. I don't believe abortion should be illegal, I don't believe homosexuality is a sin, and I strongly think women should be ordained. (Although don't get me wrong, I don't want our priest's job.) I guess the best way I can explain it is that it's like falling in love with your future spouse. There are things that you like about that person and things that you don't like. It is not that the negative things aren't there, but that, when you know the person is right for you, the negatives matter in a different way. So, yes, there are things I disagree with, but if the Holy Spirit can call me, I can let those disagreements rest with the Holy Spirit.

Mass was lovely and incredibly difficult at the same time. I wish I could remember more of the commentary on the Gospel, but I was focused on keeping Kai in the pew. Two people approached us afterward, said hello to the kids, and told them what a good job they had done. We looked at the nativity and the crucifix. Father came to the back at the end and introduced himself to the kids and asked their names. He blessed them, he blessed me. It was good, very good, and I left with a calm on my soul.